Joey

A MANAGER'S DILEMA An office manager had money problems & had to fire an employee, either Jack or Jill... He thought he'd fire the employee who came late to work the next morning. Well, both employees came to work very early. Then the manager thought he would catch the first one who took a coffee break. Unfortunately, neither employee took a coffee break. Then the manager decided to see who took the longest lunch break - strangely, neither Jack nor Jill took a lunch break that day, they both ate at their desk. Then the manager thought he'd wait & see who would leave work the earliest and both employees stayed after closing. Jill finally went to the coat rack & the manager went up to her & said, "Jill, I have a terrible problem. I don't know whether to lay you or Jack off." Jill said, "Well, you'd better jack off, because I'm late for my bus." ---------------------------------------- I apologise now if this has been said before but i thought it was quite funny

Just something to add to the above, if anybody wants my gamer info then PM me

I love Aygo's! think theyre really cute lil cars - wouldnt mind one of those as my first car

lol probably!! I never really know where I am at these days - I would expect that if you are around this area that I have seen you no doubt lol

Ah right - well i dont drive - i am on here as my boyfriend is part of this forum and i generally go up with him a lot (Mikey Jay). Not sure if you know of him or not lol. As for shows i dont know what is coming up really as of yet. I will ask him though

to me? No i didnt im afraid :S when was this?

This is a game called Track Mania Nations. Basically you download it onto your PC (not a big file so dont worry) and you can race other people from other countries on random tracks (some which you can even create yourself!) You even have your own gamer tags which your friends can add to show when you are online. Its absolutely fab and I have to say it has me hooked - go and check it out. http://www.trackmania.com/en/index.php?rub=nations the official website will give you more information as i know that I probably dont sell it very well ^^^^ I look forward to seeing you on there soon.

haha i do that sometimes too! never mind (gets your post count up ;))

ooo yeah i remember Micro Machines - used to play that with my brother a lot (always lost ) ;)

Admittedly I have been watching it just to see what this year's housemates are like - I have to say they are already annoying me and its only been a few days! I just think now BB is seriously overrated - I mean do they seriously need to keep doing it every year? I watched it to begin with but now its so predictable - housemates go in, they mingle, they argue (about Chips!? oh dear!), then they come out, they get slagged by the media........ good life huh? I do think the blind guy is sweet though - its good they are getting someone in who has a disability, shows that BB is open for everyone who wants to do it.

God yeah! i used to play it constantly!

I am 21 years young

I could never get enough of Sonic! that was just the best game for me as a child

Apologies for the offence caused - was not intentional - as said was just a joke I knew of. Didnt mean to hurt anybodys feelings - especially you Idrees. Idrees I would have thought you would think better of me - I have never once done anything to offend anybody on this forum so why would I decide to start now? I could say some things about some jokes on here that I have taken wrongly etc but at the end of the day - they are jokes. This is a 'jokes' thread. It isnt meant towards anybody. Once again however, I deeply apologise for the offence caused towards everybody on here. I honestly did not mean anything by it.

A Taliban suicide bomber pulls the plug and explodes...........BOOM!!! A short while later he finds himself on a huge white staircase leading Towards the heavens, so he starts ascending. After an hour or so of climbing, he arrives at a landing where an old Man in white robes and a long flowing beard is sitting surrounded by ledgers. 'Excuse me, Sir,' he says. 'Are you Mohammed?' 'No,' replies the old man. 'I am St. Peter. Mohammed is further up the stairs.' 'But this is great news,' exclaims the bomber. 'Mohammed is higher than St. Peter! I can hardly believe it!' He continues ascending the stairs. After another hour of hard climbing he arrives at another landing. Standing on the landing is a serene-looking man with long hair and a Long white beard. 'Excuse me, Sir,' he says. 'Are you Mohammed?' 'No,' replies the man. 'I am Jesus. Mohammed is further up the stairs.' 'But this is amazing news,' exclaims the bomber. 'Mohammed is even higher than Jesus! Martyrdom is wonderful!!' With this, he continues ascending the stairs. After two hours of hard climbing, he arrives on a huge landing. There, sitting on a magnificent throne, is another old man with Flowing white robes, a beard, and long white hair. 'Excuse me, Sir,' he says. 'Are you Mohammed?' 'No,' replies the old man.. 'I am God.' 'But this is incredible news!' screams the bomber. 'Mohammed is higher than God even!! I am so excited, I can't believe It! Martyrdom is thrilling!!' 'You look tired, my son,' says God. 'Would you like to sit down and rest a while?' 'Oh yes,' replies the bomber. 'I am very tired and would love a rest before I carry on, thank you.' The bomber sits and God says, 'You look thirsty, my son. Would you like A cup of coffee?' 'Oh yes, please, ' replies the bomber. 'I am most thirsty, thank you.' With this, God turns and snaps his fingers and shouts, 'Oy, Mohammed, Two coffees over here you paki bastard, and make it snappy!!!'

saw your car yesterday Jagster! lovin the white wheels! ;) .....but what happened to your lil JAG bit on the back? ? ? ;)

Hey Rick dont make us females sound that degraded! we always have you lot round our little fingers you know ;)

Happy Birthday ;)

hehe awww *gets out the violin*

oh the life of a student ay? :angry: I remember it all so well...................................and miss it!!!

Welcome to the site - that Glanza is awesome!! Im not surprised you couldnt let it go

hi welcome to the site - always nice to see new people becoming one of the team

haha like you and Josh did you mean ;)

ive always been a cod fan - that and GTA. Cant beat them! lol