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Chat up lines!


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Just been reading a thread on TGTT absolutely in stitches :D

Some pretty good chat up lines :D

1) I wish you were a door so I could bang you all day long.

2) (Lick finger and wipe on her shirt)

Let's get you out of those wet clothes.

3) Nice legs... What time do they open?

4) Do you work for the post office? I thought I saw you

checking out my package.

5) You've got 206 bones in your body, want one more?

6) Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?

7) I may not be the best looking guy in here, but I'm the

only one talking to you.

8) I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big Breasted

Bed thrasher, have you seen one?

9) I'm fighting the urge to make you the happiest woman on

earth tonight.

10) Wanna play army? I'll lie down and you can blow the hell

outta me.

11) I'd really like to see how you look when I'm naked.

12) You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty

is only a light switch away.

13) You must be the limp doctor because I've got a stiffy.

14) I'd walk a million miles for one of your smiles, and

even farther for that thing you do with your tongue.

15) If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be

you by morning.

16) (Look down at your crotch) Well, it's not just going to

suck itself.

17) You know, if I were you, I'd have sex with me.

18) You, Me, Whipped cream and Handcuffs. Any questions?

19) Those clothes would look great in a crumpled heap on my

bedroom floor.

20) My name is (name)...remember that, you'll be screaming

it later.

21) Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk

by again?

22) Hi, the voices in my head told me to come over and talk

to you.

23) I know milk does a body good, but DAMN, how much have

you been drinking?

24) Do you sleep on your stomach? Can I?

25) Do you wash your pants in Mr Sheen because I can see

myself in them?

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"I have bagles, let's get naked!"

"Your legs are like butter, so spread 'em."

Put 50p on the bar next to her and walk off. After a minute or two come back draw attention to the coin and say "It's still there - I thought you were going to phone your mum...." After she goes "what?", say, "To tell her you're not coming home tonight..."

"Was your father a thief, because he stole the stars and put them in your eyes."

"You don't sweat much for a fat girl"

my own crapper... :D :D

"would you like some water?? because you look to hot to handle!!!"

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a broken nose for a cheesey chat up line???????

jeeeeeeez, at least it IS a compliment and means u'd be worth tryin to chat up, cheesy or not! i'd rather be flattered with a cheesy line than get NOTHING at all...but then some folk just dont know how to take a tongue-in-cheek chat up line i guess.

Phil.

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a broken nose for a cheesey chat up line???????

jeeeeeeez, at least it IS a compliment and means u'd be worth tryin to chat up, cheesy or not! i'd rather be flattered with a cheesy line than get NOTHING at all...but then some folk just dont know how to take a tongue-in-cheek chat up line i guess.

Phil.

Cant be doing with cheesey people trying to chat you up when i dont need to be chatted up cause im happily engaged!

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but could you be happier?! :D:D

tbh tho how is a guy ment to know that your engaged? what do you think the first few things we check out are? engagement ring?! :D

you should feel flattered if a guy has the bottle to chat you up in the first place, let alone use one of them lines and wait to get shot down in flames!!

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If some one came up to me and said any of those chat up lines, I would make him look like such a dick he would wish he never came up to me! :D

And he would get dropped if he said number 7 or 12! :D

I hate chat up lines, I would rather a bloke came up and just started talking normally! Rather than use cheesey lines to 'impress' me!

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If some one came up to me and said any of those chat up lines, I would make him look like such a dick he would wish he never came up to me! ;)

And he would get dropped if he said number 7 or 12! :)

I hate chat up lines, I would rather a bloke came up and just started talking normally! Rather than use cheesey lines to 'impress' me!

Haha god i love your style so sound so a like me haha,its like fcuk off im trying to dance haha!

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If some one came up to me and said any of those chat up lines, I would make him look like such a dick he would wish he never came up to me! :D

And he would get dropped if he said number 7 or 12! :D

I hate chat up lines, I would rather a bloke came up and just started talking normally! Rather than use cheesey lines to 'impress' me!

I think you're missing a sense of humour, they are jokes intended for cheeky chaps (and lass'). Not to be taken seriously, but possibly used to break the ice. I'm sure if you made him look like a dick he'd see the funny side.

Anywho, 'You must be a lumberjack, because you gave me wood.' And any Subway 6" or 12" joke you can think of.

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