Sparky Posted September 14, 2007 Share Posted September 14, 2007 LMAO ;) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Idrees Posted September 14, 2007 Share Posted September 14, 2007 ;) :P Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Nanglebadger Posted September 15, 2007 Share Posted September 15, 2007 ;) :P Phil. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
IceBlue_Glanza Posted September 15, 2007 Share Posted September 15, 2007 lmfao i was just reading down some of these jokes n sum of them are really good lol funny guys lol, cheeck out "My Glanza" lol ;) Thanks. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Sparky Posted September 19, 2007 Share Posted September 19, 2007 A guy checks into a hotel on a business trip and was a bit lonely so hethought he'd get one of those girls you see advertised in phone booths when you're calling for a cab. He grabbed a card on his way in. It was anad for a girl calling herself Erogonique, a lovely girl, bending over inthe photo. She had all the right curves in all the right places, beautiful long wavy hair, long graceful legs all the way up. You knowthe kind. So he's in the room and figures, what the heck, "I'll give her acall.""Hello?" the woman says. Wow! she sounded sexy."Hi, I hear you give a great massage and I'd like you to come to my roomand give me one. No, wait, I should be straight with you. I'm in town all alone and what I really want is sex. I want it hard, I want it hot,and I want it now. I'm talking kinky the whole night long. You name it,we'll do it.... Bring implements, toys, everything you've got in your bag of tricks. We'll go hot and heavy all night; Tie me up, wear a strapon, cover me in chocolate syrup and whipped cream, anything you wantbaby.Now, how does that sound?"She says, "That sounds fantastic ...but for an outside line Sir, youneed to press 9." Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Idrees Posted September 19, 2007 Share Posted September 19, 2007 LOL Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Nanglebadger Posted September 20, 2007 Share Posted September 20, 2007 :D :P awesome!Phil. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
SiCaln Posted September 20, 2007 Share Posted September 20, 2007 rofl funny stuff Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Sparky Posted October 31, 2007 Share Posted October 31, 2007 A 13 year-old boy comes home from school and his mom ask how was his day was. He replies, "I had sex with my teacher today." "Oh my god! You get to your room! Wait for your father to get home!" says the mom. Awhile later the father comes home and the mom says, "Go up to your son's room and talk to him, he's been really bad today. Dad goes up to his son's room and asks why mom is so mad. "I told her that I had sex with my teacher today," replied the boy. "Alright! That's my boy!", says dad. "Ya know son, women just don't think like men. But I'm proud of you. What are you now, about 13, right? Wow. That's my son! Ya know what? I'm so proud of you I'm gonna take you out and buy you that new bike you've been wanting!" So the dad and his son go out and buy the nicest, reddest, shiniest bike in the whole town. "You gonna ride it home son?" asks dad. The boy replied, " Nah, my ass is still sore." ;) ;) Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Nanglebadger Posted November 1, 2007 Share Posted November 1, 2007 :( ;) ;) :( Phil. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Sparky Posted November 1, 2007 Share Posted November 1, 2007 a man kills a deer and takes it home to cook for dinner, he and his wife decide that they wont tell the kids what kind of meat it is, but will give them a clue and let them guess instead..... the kids were eager to know what the meat was so they begged there father for a clue... well the father said"its what mummy calls me sometimes" the little girl turns to her brother and says "dont eat it its an ass hole"Another joke blatantly pinched from TGTT for the entertainment of UKSC Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Nanglebadger Posted November 1, 2007 Share Posted November 1, 2007 :D Phil. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Sparky Posted November 2, 2007 Share Posted November 2, 2007 Johnny wanted to have sex with a girl in his office, but she had a boyfriend. One day Johnny got so frustrated that he went up to her and said "I'll give you a 100 quid if you let me have sex with you..." but the girl said "NO."Johnny said "I'll be fast, I'll throw the money on the floor, you bend down, and I'll be finished by the time you pick it up." She thought for a moment and said that she would have to consult her boyfriend.... so she called her boyfriend and told him the story. Her boyfriend says ask him for 200, pick up the money very fast, he won't even be able to get his pants down.She agrees and accepts the proposal. Half an hour goes by and the boyfriend is waiting for his girlfriend to call. Finally after 45 minutes the boyfriend calls and asks what happened.. She said "The b*stard used pound coins!" Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Nanglebadger Posted November 2, 2007 Share Posted November 2, 2007 :D Phil. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Lukey_B Posted November 2, 2007 Share Posted November 2, 2007 quality! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
rob_bower Posted November 2, 2007 Share Posted November 2, 2007 ha ha ha oive got a joke but its abit riskay dont you think phil!!! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
gaz Posted November 2, 2007 Share Posted November 2, 2007 Hahaha some are well good.Did you hear about the gay magician?..disapeared with a poof. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Sparky Posted November 3, 2007 Share Posted November 3, 2007 Short and sweet....nice one Gaz :D Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Nanglebadger Posted November 3, 2007 Share Posted November 3, 2007 get it flung up Rob for everyones enjoyment!Phil. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
rob_bower Posted November 3, 2007 Share Posted November 3, 2007 If you insist Phil...****DO NOT READ IF EASILY OFFENDED****36inch DD breasts, covered in warm belgian chocolate.....1inch erect nipples pierced with gold nipple rings topped with fresh whipped cream...Clean shaven minge framed by an open crotch leather thong...Moist salty clit mothered in rich blackberry jam...This is not ordinary porn...This is M&S porn!!!or should that be S&M?? i nearly wee'd the first time i got this by text!! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
gaz Posted November 3, 2007 Share Posted November 3, 2007 lol ha smooth!An Eskimo is out for a drive one day when his car breaks down and he is forced to call out the Alaskan AA. The Eskimo stands in the howling wind and waits for the mechanic to arrive. When the mechanic reaches the broken car, he sets to work, looking under the bonnet until he appears to have located the problem. He looks up at the Eskimo and says, "You've blown a seal, mate." To which the Eskimo hastily replies, "No, I haven't. That's just frost on my moustache." Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Nanglebadger Posted November 3, 2007 Share Posted November 3, 2007 :D Phil. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
BoostJunkie Posted November 7, 2007 Share Posted November 7, 2007 Older woman invites an innocent young boy home for sex and she wants to do a 69. The boy asks whats that and she says you put your head between mine and i do the same to you. So he does and she lets out a little fart she apologies and go back to it she farts again the boy gets up and starts to get dressed. She says i'm sorry.... what are you doing.he says i'm not hanging around here for another 67 of those. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
gaz Posted November 7, 2007 Share Posted November 7, 2007 hahahaI heard this on the radio today'I had 14 yogurts yesterday... i was mullered.' Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Jozinobi Posted November 7, 2007 Share Posted November 7, 2007 LMAO! This should be X-Rated Jokes Section lolJoz Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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