How to juggle being in a relationship and going out with mates, i'm failing at it anyone wanna chat about it?

[GavinsBeard]

Basically what the title says, need a better way to juggle my Gf and my mates because atm i'm failing horribly at it and it's making me feel shit...

Edited July 30, 2014 by GavinsBeard

[davehart]

Well, ditch the bird

Plenty more where they came from!

[ryan lang]

Sorry I thought I logged onto www.agonyaunt.co.uk for a moment there.

[morgey]

Never bothered with a missus, too much time and money, plus I cant handle the same person for too long

[GavinsBeard]

Dave, you are a legend my friend. Staright out with it :L

[Eynonz]

Luckily for me, my GF is also into jap cars, so we kinda have the same crowd of friends. Makes life a lot easier.

[TimD]

ha.. I remember when I used to worry about splitting time with girlfriend and friends. Now it seems a lot easier to balance, maybe because most of my friends are also in relationships, so we either go out as couples, or us guys get together so infrequently it's never really an issue when it happens. I also play a lot of sport, so that helps with the whole guy time / time away from the other half.

You've just got to do what you think is right, at 19 you've both still got a heap to learn.. Enjoy it, but don't get too caught up in the whole relationship thing, if it stops being fun then move along, there's loads of women out there, loads!

[akyakapotter]

If you own a starlet say good bye to a girlfriend they tend to get very jelious of these awesome little cars and tell you you love it more than them spend more money and time on them and with the mate situation don't neglect your friends as there the ones who are there when the shit hits the fan

[Gainzy]

My starlets been more reliable than some lasses I've been out with, don't ditch your mates for a lass but try get a good balance between them...always buy parts wheels before meals lol

[drongo boi]

Get her told straight of ya wana go out Wi ya mates then do it :-) aslong as ya still make abit time to see her then she can't really complain lol bros before hoes :-P

Edited July 31, 2014 by drongo boi

[Addymk2]

Talk her into going out with her mates more often. Make it look like it's in her interest. Worked for years for me. 'babe you haven't seen her in ages, you should go say hi!'

[FrozenJakalope]

^^^ this.

My missus and I have nights where she sees her friends and I see mine. Keeps everyone happy, just need good communication.

What exactly about the situation is making you feel shit? If you feel like you're neglecting her or your friends, say that to them. If they're worth having, they'll understand and help. Again, communication.

Talking to people usually fixes things, give it a try.

And if it fails, fuck em. If they can't see your point of view you don't need them in your life.

[Arnold]

Try and get your misses to do things you like doing with your mates, or if you want your own time, just arrange to do something with them and let her do what she wants. You can't live in each others pockets all the time. They also shouldn't change you, so if you enjoy going out, they should know that from day 1 instead of making you feel guilty about doing what you like. I'm sure if she ever wanted to do something then you wouldn't say no, so might be worth throwing that one back at her if she ever complains.

[aaddzz123]

I think the only way you really learn how to do this is from experience. I think you need to have been on both sides of the situation before you can appreciate how she feels and same applies for her. In the past I've been bored and lonely whilst my partner would be out all the time and I used to feel like shit but then in turn I spend a lot of time with mates now or busy doing stuff and spend little time with my mrs when she's bored and lonely.

I think you both just need to be reasonable. You both want to do your own thing and both want to see each other. Get to know one another's friends but that doesn't mean see them every time the other one does. Compromise. Try split it even and convince your mrs to do her own thing too. Gives you time to miss each other and appreciate being together when you are. And when you're not lol.

[aaddzz123]

Also every person is different. Some people can go weeks without seeing their other half and others can't last a day... That's a relationship choice you're going to have to decide for yourself whether it will work or not.

[Ollieh17]

my girlfriend often comes out with me, meals and drinks and stuff with the mates. That way i can kill two birds with one stone and have a good time. When it comes to cars she normally goes off somewhere and brings me back food. pretty ideal tbf

[fremyjay]

If you own a starlet say good bye to a girlfriend they tend to get very jelious of these awesome little cars and tell you you love it more than them spend more money and time on them and with the mate situation don't neglect your friends as there the ones who are there when the shit hits the fan

100% agree my missus absolutely hates my glanza

But i used to spend all my time with my mates and spent more time crashing at theres than at mine, but since ive had a missus and kid i dont get chance to spend as much time as i would like with my mates, working nights and currently training to join the royal marines leaves me with maybe 1 day a week to see my mates and thats if im not working on the glanza, unfortunately relationships kill your social life so either you want a relationship or you want a social life

[daniel_g]

Mates & social life wins hands down everytime, every girl that id had a serious / semi serious a relationship with (like seeing them for a few months) has turned out to be a nutter.

Suppose if youve got a mentally sound girlfriend then thats a bonus and probably worth keeping her fairly happy

[Dean_mc88]

Try working away months at a time , owning a starlet and juggling what ever free time you have between starlet, friends and girlfriend.

[fremyjay]

Try working away months at a time , owning a starlet and juggling what ever free time you have between starlet, friends and girlfriend.

Im not looking forward too that, how do you cope haha as when i start my training i will be away for a month at a time, then god knows

[Dean_mc88]

I work all sorts of places around the world, im away for a min of a month come back have about 5 days off then back in the shop and possibly out again in another 2 weeks. ive spent 70% of my time out of the uk this year and my missus hates it, complains when I extend my stay. luckily I have my own house so when im home she stays nearly every night and sees her friends and I see mine on some weekends, I spend about an hr or two after work if im in the shop on the starlet then see her. I barely get any free time to myself unless shes in work and im off and even then im at the garage on the starlet lol.

[JoJo_228]

My boyfriend owns a starlet.. and he hasn't ditched me yet. Probably because I bought a starlet too !

In all fairness, I can be a needy bitch sometimes, and want to see him all the time etc. But he still sees his mates and I see mine occasionally. We do a lot together.. whether it be spending just our time together or him fixing his car etc/doing other car bits(fixing mine) Sometimes I do feel he loves his car more than me.. but recently I love my car more also ;)!

Pretty much, you need to find a happy medium ? Find something that you both agree on.. Make sure you still show you care.. that you need time away, with mates/cars.. If you just let it all evolve - shit will hit the fan and maybe cause an uproar.. !

If you don't see her all the time, then when you do see her, do something special or worthwhile! I'm moving 30 miles away from my boyfriend so will probably see him less but it will give me chance to find new stuff to do, and he'll do his stuff. At the end of the day, he still wants and gets his cuddles as well as showing his car and mates some attention... don't you aaddzz123 !

[littlegreenmonster]

See i just let my other half get on with whatever she wants and then if i do the same and she has a go just tell her to piss off lol it sounds harsh hut it really works well, that way we both do what we want to do and if im honest

[5e colin]

WELL basically living with a bird means being under nazi regime !!!!! trust me im old and know it ha ha they are way to bossy

its faaaaaaaaar better being single . atleast i wish i was !!!!

[bdohohh]

having a boyfriend who has a starlet used to be so annoying haha. The first few years we were together i couldn't understand how he'd rather spend money on car parts than take me out to the cinema or whatever.
But that all changed when I passed my test llf.

We're both pretty understanding of each other, he has a stressful job so pretty much anytime he wants to go out with his friends rather than see me I let him, and I'll just clean my car or something.
if she's needy and doesn't let you see your friends, she's probably not worth it. I've had the same set of friends since I was like 11 but been in a few relationships since then so...